I have been sooo tired this week. Hard to get to sleep at 10pm, hard to wake up at 6am. this morning I was so out of it, I forgot to shampoo my hair when I showered. I swear sometimes I feel like I am getting dimentia. *eerie music here*
So it’s the time when we talk about our New Year’s resolutions, right? Well, I have several. 1. Podcasts! Get them going ASAP. I am now falling asleep holding podcast topic broadcasts in my head. How sad is that?
2. Repair my credit and start saving for retirement. I was seduced by the credit monster years ago when I was young and stupid and had to declare bankruptcy when I was 24. And my mistakes messed up my mother’s credit as well. So I am really wanting to repair as much of the damage as possible.
3. Continue to get better at remembering it is not my job to fix EVERYTHING. I am a very “mothering” person, to the point I am self-neglectful and endup screwing myself sometimes to help others. Helping people is important to me, but I need to develop a healthy realization of when it is appropriate to help and where it is better for me to just lend a shoulder to lean on, and that’s all.
4. Stop being so afraid of the phone. OK, I know it sounds odd, but I have an intense fear of the phone. When it comes to just talking with friends and general things it’s fine, but business calls, calling for information, phone interviews, etc., I get extremely flustered and have high anxiety. I know some of it stems from evil bill collectors when I was younger. Other factors include hate calls (I work in a gay business) and of course the crackpot phone calls which I usually get and am too polite to just hang up on someone. I need to get better at that. I’ve gotten to where I can now tell salesmen “no, thank you” and hang up on them. That’s so ridiculous isn’t it? It’s a phone call, but to me when the phone rings it’s like an alarm that sends a wave of anxiety through me. Hmm…well, this year I’ll make myself get over it. 
OK, well, just a note that my posting will be spotty over the next several days as we are entering deadline here at the magazine. Leave me comments. Let me know ya’ll ‘r’ out there. 
Posted by Nephi on January 5, 2007 at 1:55 AM
I didn’t know the phone still gave you that many problems. In fact, I’ve known you all these years and I never knew the full extent of it until now. Do y’all really get hate phone calls there? I thought we were past that. Sad……
Posted by spankingbeaarthur on January 5, 2007 at 3:26 PM
We do get hate calls. Mostly they are phone messages left late at night. Thankfully it’s not too many, but it’s a sobering reminder to come in in the morning and hear someone on the phone yelling about the evil of fags. I wrote a column about it last December or January.